Positions To Help You Last Longer

BEFORE YOU GET STARTED

Keep in mind that it takes more than just sex positions to help you last longer. First off, you need to keep a positive frame of mind. Don't turn it into a self-fulfilling prophecy by continuously telling yourself that you can't do it. You can, especially if you believe you can.

If you have some sort of medical drawback, like  erectile dysfunction, then these positions to help you last longer obviously won't work for you. Be realistic and get yourself to a professional as soon as you can to optimize your sex life.

IT'S ALL A GAME

Turning foreplay into a game of lustful sexual containment can be more fun than the actual sex itself. Make your foreplay last. After all, when have you ever heard a woman saying, "He kisses my lips and goes down on me for way too long?" That's what I thought.

Enjoy the time you have together and stop focusing on the actual sex because that'll likely cause you to get more nervous, and end up leaving her in the bathroom with a vibrating shower nozzle. Make it a total body experience, not just a penis one -- oh, and learn to  please her in the shower as well.

PLAY WITH IT MASTER

You've all heard it before: Practice makes perfect. Don't be shy guys, you did it when you first discovered that something other than urine comes out of your penis, and you can do it now.Masturbation is not a four-letter word (there we go, stating the obvious) and if you want to understand your own waterworks, you're going to have to play the "getting to know you" game with yourself.

By stroking yourself and figuring out at which point you feel like ejaculating, you can learn how to maintain your erection and avoid premature incidents. Also, you can bring yourself to the point where you feel like you're about to lose it and stop yourself until the feeling goes away. Keep it up until an adequate amount of time has passed and then let the rivers flow freely.

 

THIS IS YOUR MISSION

Perhaps it is not the most explosive of sexual positions and, hey, it may not even merit the "Best Position in the Bedroom" award. This position, nonetheless, is most helpful for men who want to prolong coitus.

Speaking of coitus, you can try practicing coitus interruptus, which entails deliberately withdrawing your slimy guy from her vagina prior to ejaculation and holding it. Soon afterwards, you may insert your little guy back in and continue on your merry way.
Remember that the instant she lifts her legs in the air or you lift your own body, you may end up feeling more intense sensations. We, therefore, recommend that you begin with body-to-body missionary and slowly work your way up with variety.

SIT IN FRONT OF ME

Another great position that'll help most men last longer in the sack is the "sitting inside each other" position. You sit with your legs crossed and she sits atop you doing the same and controlling the tempo.

The great thing about this position is that you get to rub her back or pull her by the shoulders and suck on her breasts with ease. As well, she can bite into your neck or rub your back while you both enjoy a constant sexual pace.

When you become accustomed to this situation and learn adequate  peniscontrol, then you can give her some new instructions and get her to squat up and down on your member while she uses her hands to balance herself on your knees.

RIDE 'EM COWGIRL

Although some guys lose control, considering they don't have any power when the woman on top does all the maneuvering, many men find a woman's back-and-forth thrusting (rather than up and down) very comfortable.

Allowing her to take control of the situation can help you concentrate on keeping yourorgasm at bay. As well, you get to watch your sweetheart bounce around while she does her thing.

Once the thrusting thing becomes child's play for you, you can try letting her squat. But be warned: The squatting position is likely to make you lose your mind (and your  semen) a lot faster. That's because her vagina tends to hug your penis rather tightly, and your genitals and hers are the only two body parts that are touching.

SIDE BY SIDE

This position should usually be reserved for morning sex. With her back facing you, lift up one of her legs and insert yourself inside her warm fleshy area.

Although the initial feeling may be that of tightness, if you brace yourself, the feeling will become more comforting. Many guys are able to control themselves and last longer in this position.

TAKE YOUR TIME

Move slowly and don't rush things. Getting overly excited won't do you any good so just keep things calm and at an unhurried, steady tempo. She'll be impressed with your ability to control yourself.

Obviously, these positions won't work wonders for everyone, but they will definitely feel great for many. Remember, if you have a problem, see your doctor promptly and don't play the game of denial. And there you have it, some easy ways to keep her satisfied and get a little satisfaction of your own at the same time.

 

Orgasm : Do You Show Up For the Big O?

Do you show up - I mean really show up - when you have sex or make love? You might think, "Well, anyone would show up for that, right?" In the past, I would have agreed with this statement. Now, I have some serious doubts. I firmly believe in the importance of showing up and being present. Being present is essential to creating a full, sensuous, enjoyable experience of life. Though "being present" may sound like something that should be easy, in actuality, it poses a great challenge for many or most of us. Few people realize how little time they spend truly being present... even for events that should be pleasurable.

I used to think, without a doubt, that I showed up all the time. Then, in my early thirties, I received a "wake up call" when I began to do a lot of "consciousness work." Prior to that, I had been on a path of self-exploration for over a decade, but this was an intensive new phase of my personal growth process, bringing a whole new level of self-discovery. By the time I began this, I had graduated Summa Cum Laude from an Ivy League college, and had enjoyed tremendous academic success in a top-rated graduate program in Counseling Psychology. I had been involved in the performing arts, singing solos in choirs and playing leading roles in musical theater productions. As a hopeful romantic, I had experienced my share of joys and heartbreaks. So when I began participating in this series of retreats and trainings, my ego told me that I, of all people, must be good at being present - especially to have been able to accomplish what I had accomplished academically. I had a big surprise in store for me...

The more I learned about becoming aware and being present, the more I realized how little time I had been spending in awareness or in the present. I once had what was, to myself at that time, the embarrassing realization that -- almost whenever I was making love -- I would suddenly transport myself, mentally, to places I had been before. Without any warning or logical connection to anything, my mind would take me to a square in Florence, a house in Greece, an outdoor hot-tub in Arizona, or a cliff overlooking the Pacific Ocean in California. One time I recall, out of the blue, seeing myself as a fourth grader on the playground outside the elementary school I attended as a child. When I caught myself, all I could think was, "What the hell am I doing here?" It was not the most flattering moment for a young woman who had been striving to be a wonderful, sensual lover! Needless to say, I certainly was not experiencing great passion and intimacy in the moments I was completely "checked out."

In order to have a heightened, sensual experience, you really need to get present. In particular, you need to show up for the "Big O"! Okay, well maybe some of you can have a half-decent orgasm while fantasizing about some Playboy Bunny or Chippendale hunk, and/or some Victoria's Secret model or that stud in the latest Calvin Klein underwear ad. But I truly believe that you cannot have a fully embodied, "blow your mind and curl your toenails" kind of orgasm when your mind is wandering off somewhere. Neither can you build deep intimacy with a romantic partner under such circumstances, if that is what you are seeking to do.

If people were motivated to show up for anything, you would think that they would be motivated to show up for a pleasurable, sensual, and potentially loving experience. What about you? Do you spend time "in the moment"? 

Do you show up for the "Big O"? If you are not certain about whether or not you are truly present, then -- assuming that if you are reading this you probably are sexually active -- this may be one area in which to test yourself. You may want to ask yourself some of these questions (either while making love or while reviewing it afterward):

• Am I truly feeling, seeing, and engaging in what is happening in the moment?
• Am I truly experiencing the person I am with - rather than taking for granted that I already know him or her?
• Am I comparing him or her to a previous lover or to some ideal lover I have in my mind?
• Am I fantasizing about someone else?
• Am I concerned about the time?
• Am I worrying about work/studying/errands I should be doing now, or need to do later?
• Is my mind wandering to financial concerns or other challenges in my life?

In other words, the main question is:
Am I really here, or am I "checked out" and thinking about someone or something else?

Of course, you can ask similar questions about whether or not you truly are present for any experience in life that you are having, not just intimate or sexual experiences. If you discover, in this process of questioning, that you are not present very often, do not feel dismayed: this just means that you are a pretty normal human being. Realizing that you are not present can serve as a wake up call: When you become aware enough to "catch yourself" when you are checked out, you can begin to bring yourself back to the present. Many of us avoid the present. When we are in the present, we really allow life to impact us: hence, we feel vulnerable to life, and thus potentially vulnerable to feeling pain. However, it is only in taking the risk of being present that we can experience sheer joy and ecstasy, as well. So, the next time you are making love, take a risk: Show up for the "Big O"!

You'll be glad you came

Prolong your Lovemaking: Making It Last

How many of us are dissatisfied with our sex lives? Quite a plentitude of people want more or have trouble getting there because their lovers are finished before they have even started, or worse that they finish right when she's just warming up. As much as we would like to, we can't just lay blame on our lovers. We must take responsibility for our bodies/souls needs and create what we want and how we want it. "I always psyche myself into believing I'm some hot little sex kitten. I play out in my mind what I'd like to do with him and get very graphic. This always keeps me going. - "When entertaining a man one cannot neglect the setting. Make sure it's a place where both of you can be relaxed. Comfort is a major key when becoming intimate. Mellow lighting lots of pillows and silky sheets make for a nice start for my honey and I! I want him to know were going to be there for a while."-Marta S, Fla.

This may sound old fashioned but it can really make a difference when you take the time to know your lover. I mean really know them. How can your souls collide if you aren't connected on an emotional level? The quickie animal stuff just isn't for me!"-Trinidad "Most important for me is to trust your partner and to be loving with each other. I feel so vulnerable in intimate conditions, that I would rather wait for the loving relationship, rather than settle for some cheap sex." - "Don't get so set on the goal of orgasm. Enjoy sex for the moment and give attentions to the whole experience. Don't just focus on your genitals."- "Stop for a rest, when things start to slow down a bit. I find it fun and reviving to make a refrigerator raid. I usually keep plenty of goodies ready, I come running back to the bedroom or living room with treats, and before you know it we are at it again. It's fun to feed each other chocolate cherries ... then some yummy kisses can commence."- "Show him what you want. I actually ask my lovers to do this or bite harder on my nipples; there's no harm in getting it right. The men are usually very happy to accommodate my demands! - "I think most men do have a tender side to their nature, but society has put these stereotypes out there that make them think they have to be the hard driving, macho erection machine. Let him know that you don't want him to restrain himself from more tender expressions of his love. Men are conditioned to think they have to be "all that" all of the time. Take off the pressure."-Sonja, New Zealand

" Remember that variety is the spice of life! My husband and I love to roll play. We make whole stories and record them on video. Dressing the parts and all. We make a whole production out of it. It's fun. We also enjoy an open relationship and enjoy swinging and playing with other couples. It has added so much excitement to our love lives."

Sex Position of the Week

EROTIC INSTRUCTIONS: Your partner slouches down in a comfy but sturdy chair, his legs slightly spread. You straddle his lap as you face him, your knees bent and open against his chest, your feet braced against the seat of the chair. While your guy grips your hips, thighs, or butt, you clutch the back of the chair and begin moving up and down along his shaft.
WHY YOU'LL LOVE IT: It's traditional girl-on-top with a tempting twist, explains Joan Elizabeth Lloyd, author of Now and Forever: Let's Make Love (Warner Books, 1997). With your knees bent and your hands and feet using the chair as a springboard, it's the bounciest nooky style ever — perfect for teasing your guy with fast up-and-down action, then shifting gears and going for wide circular motions. Plus, your bodies are close enough for the intimacy of kissing, touching, or just giving each other incredibly lusty looks.The slicker, the better as you ride this wanton wave. Before you start bonking his buoy, grab a little extra lube to keep things extra wet. Heat things up more by putting your motion lotion on each other — the feel of your hands sliding against his most sensitive spots will definitely get him in the mood.

20 Things She Notices About You

1. Your well-muscled left forearm. Conveniently located directly above the very first thing I notice: your ring finger.

2. Your skin tone. 1 percent increase in tan = 47 percent increase in muscle tone.

3. Your resemblance to a rock. The Rock, Kid Rock, and all the rocks in between are equally attractive. So stop worrying about your body type. I like them all.

4. Your lungs. When you suck in your gut to impress me, I'm charmed silly.

5. Your stride. I love watching a man who's confident and in shape enough to run shirtless on the beach. You're barefoot, too? My heart is racing.

6. Your swim trunks. No Speedos, please. Just something stylish that shows off your moneymaker.

7. Your moneymaker. It's not what you're thinking . . . I mean those lines that start near your hips and plummet down to your groin. They make you extremely hot . . . and me very, very bothered.

8. Your resemblance to Spider-Man. Women think Tobey Maguire is sexy. And you look like you can totally kick his ass.

9. Your calves. Especially when you're playing volleyball, sprinting for the Frisbee, riding your bike, or on your hands and knees helping a 5-year-old dig a sandcastle moat. 

10. Your body in jeans . . . and a linen dress shirt with rolled-up sleeves and a backward baseball cap, all while you're splashing around with your black Lab in the surf at sunset. No, you're not wearing or doing that now. But I'm imagining you are, and you look freaking fetching. 

11. Your rear view. Three words: lower-back dimples.

12. Your activity level. Have you been lying out? Or working out?

13. Your shoulder muscles. At some point I will determine whether you're strong enough to save me when I pretend to be caught in the undertow.

14. Your brainpan. Turn the right kind of pages and you can really turn me on. What are you reading—Melville? Or Maxim?

15. Your accessories. Sunglasses and thong flip-flops = instant appeal.

16. Your attire. Salty, sandy, sun-kissed, and wearing a well-worn white T-shirt? I don't care what's under your shirt, because I can only think about getting naked. 

17. Your courage. You didn't dip your toe to test the water before jumping in.

18. Your eyes. My eyes are open under these Jackie O. sunglasses, boy, and I can see you checking me out. 

19. Your beer belly. A small one's not so bad. A tiny bit of soft flesh over the waistband is forgivable. (Just don't look like you swallowed the keg.)    

20. Your belly button. Innie? Outie? Doesn't matter. Weirdly erotic, either way.

50 Things Women Wish Men Knew

1. Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count.

2. Real men drive stick shift.

3. I will leave if you lie.

4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).

5. I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.

6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.

7. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.

8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you.

9. I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.

10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you.

11. I expect you to call me.

12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants.

13. I'm scared of losing my independence.

14. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be.

15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.

16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.)

17. If I'm not having sex with you, I'm . . . a.) . . . having a fat day. b.) . . . not feeling "connected" to you. c.) . . . blackmailing you to get something I want.

18. Shoes determine whether you're fashionable or not.

19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I'm not afraid to use it.

20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.

21. A man I love plans the occasional fancy-schmancy dress-up date and impromptu weekend getaways, and he buys my favorite candy in advance when we're just going to the movies.

22. You look hot in hooded clothing items.

23. You should never tell me what to do.

24. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast.

25. My breasts love much licking and sucking.

26. If you ask me out directly, I will say yes.

27. I'm very impressed when you ask for my advice.

28. I'm unimpressed with a man who doesn't take the lead.

29. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.

30. I want to be Madonna.

31. Women get urinary-tract infections easily, so watch (and wash) your fingers.

32. I'm in heaven when you hold my hand.

33. You're sexy when you're: shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.

34. I need to hear how you feel about me. Often. Tell me now.

35. Surprises, especially gifts for moi = more loving.

36. I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you—and for you to recognize this.

37. If I'm not feeling loved, I will start looking . . .

38. Discussion of ex-gf's and ex-bf's should be avoided at all times.

39. I like it when you tell me what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself. 

40. Celebrating our anniversary, even if it's only been a few months, earns major bonus points.

41. I love it when you're sweaty.

42. It's best to consult your gal pals for gift ideas.

43. A lady should always be greeted with kisses.

44. I like porn.

45. I love holding your bum in the palms of my hands.

46. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public.

47. It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read . . .

48. For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat.

49. I remember everything about our relationship.

50. You should know all this and more without my telling you.

The Top 10 Signs She's Interested in You

Some women go out looking for sex. Here's how to find them and make it happen. 

1. She's Chatting Up the Bartender
A flirtatious woman can hardly contain herself. She won't let a male waiter or bartender take her order without flashing a smile and saying something silly, like, "What can you make me that would be really yummy?"

2. She's Scanning the Room
When women go out to bond with friends, they have blinders on. If they're not looking around, don't bug them. But when they want to mingle, they'll be scanning for cute men. They may even sit facing the room instead of each other.

3. She's Playing Games
Darts, pool, pinball—women know this makes them easier to approach. That's why they do it. It's easy to get a man's attention when you're about to jab him in the ribs with a pool cue.

4. Her Drink is Big, Frozen, and Blue
She's ready to party, which means meeting new people and having a good time, not getting naked with the first guy who buys her another round. But sometimes it does mean getting naked with the first hot, cool guy who buys her another round.

5. She Sends You a Zoolander Eye Lock
And the eyebrow raise, and/or at least two smiles (full, open-lipped, teeth smiles). Go over there and talk to her already. Caveat: There's a small chance she just thinks you're funny looking, but go ahead, have some balls. She's worth it.

6. Her Pupils are Dilated
If she's feeling stimulated by you (not just sexually), her pupils will dilate. That's because her body is programmed to want to see more of whatever's exciting her, so her brain tells her irises to let in more light. Time to make your move.

7. She Lets You Get Close
As you flirt, stand or sit within 6 inches of her. If she seems unruffled, move closer. Eventually you want your thigh to be pressed against hers, whether you're standing or sitting. If she's into it, she won't back off.

8. She's a Chatterbox
If she leans forward when you're talking or asks you endless questions, the only way to shut her up is to kiss her.

9. She Uses Her Tongue
A make-out session is a prerequisite to any sexual proposition. Kiss her lips softly and note how intensely she's kissing back. You want the "I want to eat you alive" kind of kiss, not the sweet "I'm not a dirty girl" kind of kiss.

10. She's Wearing Thigh-High Stockings
Women only wear sexy underthings when they're expecting a man to see them. If she's wearing a thong, she's trying to avoid panty lines, but sex is on her mind, too. Anything black, red, pink, leopard print, or lace equals "I want you."

The Truth Behind the 12 Hottest Sex Myths

1. Men Reach Their Sexual Peak at 18, and Women Reach Theirs at 28
TRUE: With regard to their supply of sexual hormones, at least. Testosterone peaks at age 18 in men; women's estrogen hits its high point in their mid-20s. "But peak hormones don't mean peak sexual performance," says Marc Goldstein, M.D., a professor of reproductive medicine and urology at Cornell University's Weill Medical College. So feel free to try for a personal best—at any age.

2. Semen is Low-Carb
FALSE: "Semen is mostly fruit sugar [fructose] and enzymes—not low-carb," says Dr. Goldstein. Which finally explains why there's no Oral Sex Diet.

3. Masturbation Yields the Strongest Orgasm
TRUE: But it's not a hard-and-fast rule, as it were. "It depends on the individual," says Jon L. Pryor, M.D., a professor of urologic surgery at the University of Minnesota. "For some it does, but for others, there's nothing that beats good ol' intercourse."

4. The Average Erection Measures 8 Inches
FALSE: Relax, Shorty. It's closer to 6.

5. No Penis is Too Large or Too Small for Any Vagina
TRUE: But perception still wins the game in the end. "I was once at a dinner meeting with seven other sex doctors—six men and one woman," says Dr. Pryor. "The men all agreed that size doesn't matter. The woman looked at us and said, 'Think what you want. Size matters.' We all left dejected."

6. Oysters Make You Horny
FALSE: You make you horny. "There is no scientific evidence that oysters increase libido," says Dr. Pryor. "But there may be a placebo effect, so if it works, great!"

7. Green M&Ms Make You Horny
FALSE: Unless they do. Then it's true. Isn't the mind wonderful?

8. Men Think About Sex Every 7 Seconds
FALSE: That number is tossed around a lot, but the truth is that only 23 percent of men claim to fantasize frequently. But maybe the rest are just too distracted to check the clock.

9. Cutting Out Broccoli Will Make Your Semen Taste Better
TRUE: Semen is naturally bitter, and eating broccoli and drinking coffee can make it worse. A ray of hope for the Oral Sex Diet!

10. Having Sex Before an Important Event—the Big Game, the Critical Presentation—Can Ruin Your Performance in the Event
FALSE: Swiss researchers performed stress tests on people 2 and 10 hours after the subjects had had sex, and found that by 10 hours, the participants were fully recovered. There was only a small dip in performance 2 hours after sex.

11. Having Sex in Water (Swimming Pool, Hot Tub, Shower) Will Kill Sperm
TRUE: Some of your swimmers may die, but it isn't an effective method of birth control, according to Dr. Pryor. Though a hot tub can overheat your testicles and kill sperm, there should be plenty left for the egg hunt.

12. You Can Become Addicted to Web Porn
TRUE: But the risk is low. Only 1 percent of all people who check out Internet porn will become addicted. If you're sporting a ring, be careful: 38 percent of addicts are married.

6 Sex Mistakes You're MakingSex is a Race

1. Sex is a Race
Break it: Explore her. Focus on her thighs and lower belly. Make a mental circle 2 inches around the outside of her vagina, and don't cross the line while you kiss, lick, and caress, says Gloria Brame, Ph.D., author of Different Loving. You'll ignite her nerve endings and bring her close to her red zone. It makes sex about discovery, not some destination. "Goal-oriented sex isn't sexy,".

2. Same Time, Same Place
Break it: Relive the past. Take her to the garage and reclaim the space you long ago ceded: Seduce her in the backseat of the car. It feels a little public, it's steeped in testosterone, and there's a throwback, high-school quality to it. Make it a quickie, which has its place in the sexual diet; having lots of sexbegets more sex, because you stay connected, says Laura Berman, Ph.D., director of the Berman Center in Chicago.

3. Predictable Foreplay
Break it: Work out together. Think of it as fat-burning foreplay. It will raise her dopamine levels, easing her anxieties. "She'll feel the sex is about her and not some random need she has to accommodate," says Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., a professor of sociology at Washington University. Bonus: Your post-run sweat has androstadienone, a testosterone derivative that spikes her arousal when she smells it.

4. Lopsided First Moves
Break it: Tie her hands. It's now up to her to figure out how to remove your shirt, tie, cuff links, and pants. You'll share a few laughs and marvel at her ingenuity. Whether you tie her up or she binds you,  the game will break your predictable, first-move habits. The bonus: "It acts as an automatic foreplay extender," says Berman.

5. TV, Then Sex
Break it: Read to her. It doesn't have to be erotica. It's an intimate activity that makes her focus on your voice. The deeper, the better. Low voices are a sign of high testosterone, which ups her attraction to you, according to a Scottish study. Read lying in bed with your head up, to dip an octave; it forces you to push air with your diaphragm instead of your lungs.

6. Habitual Hand Holding
Break it: Caress her neck. Sure, holding hands can work as an aphrodisiac: It shows her you're devoted and proud to tell the world. But after a while, its poignancy wanes. A stepped-up PDA will deepen her connection to you, so she'll be more willing to really give herself to you in the bedroom, 

Seduce any woman

We all know how well guys in India fare when it comes to sex, thanks to the sex and health surveys conducted by Men’s Health across the world. Plus we have our Bollywood babes and Kamasutra legends. But there are guys in other countries who are having more sex than you.

Don’t worry—we have a plan. We took a trip around the world to find out what makes men from our country and other countries so attractive to the women they pursue. We also enlisted the help of sex experts around the globe to save you from another sexless night. Master their tips and soon you’ll simply be able to say “G’day” and mate.

International Sex Survey 2007

England
Take her, outside
Hugh Grant has typecast British men as meek and bumbling. But according to a 2005 Durex survey of 317,000 people in 41 countries, these blokes are so irresistible, their partners can’t even wait to get back to the flat. Twice as many Brits as Aamericans report having had sex on public transportation and in alleyways and gardens. “Many a chap has fallen in love in the checkout line at the supermarket,” says Vicki Ford, a British psychosexual therapist and the author of Overcoming Sexual Problems. Aapparently, they consummate it on their way home.

How to do it : Arouse her temptation. Pull her into a side alley or a dark doorway and plant one while gently stroking her neck, suggests Emily Dubberley, a British sex expert and the author of Brief Encounters. “Fear of being caught stimulates her fight-or-flight response,” explains Ford. “Adrenaline floods her system, making everything feel much more intense.”

Australia
Drive her wild
People love their cars, but Australians love in their cars. Almost 75 per cent of Aussies have had sex on the road, according to the Durex international survey. “Sneaking away for a surreptitious shag or fondle says, ‘I can’t wait,’ ” says Gabrielle Morrissey, PhD, Australian author of A Year of Spicy Sex.

How to do it : Heading to a party is the perfect opportunity to lure her over to the driver’s side—the mood is up, and you’re dressed to the nines. Playfully graze her inner thigh with your fingertips. Suggest that it’s proper to be fashionably late—how should we fill the time?—and park on a dark, secluded street for a quickie. “It’s like sharing a secret all night,” Morrissey says, “especially if you’ve promised each other an encore.” Point of caution: in India, like in several conservative countries, sex in public places is restricted. So watch your back!

Romania
Play it straight
Meeting women is easy, if you’re not sidetracked by insecurity (“Is she looking at me?”), coy games (“Have our waitress ask her waitress what she’s drinking”), or body-language interpretation (“Dude, her eyes say no, but the angle of her feet says olé!”). When Romanian men want a woman, they tell her. “The men here have a lot of self-confidence,” says Felicia Aabaza, sex editor of Men’s Health Romania. “And the women are tuned to respond to it.”

How to do it : Lean in unexpectedly and whisper in her ear, “I just had to be near you.” Be mindful of your tone. Brash: bad. Calm: good. “Caress her with your voice,” says Patricia Cihodaru, MsC, a Rromanian psychologist and sex expert. Aand when you’ve become friendly enough that you won’t get a punch in the chops, “say she looks beautiful and tell her how much you want her,” says Cihodaru. “Hearing your desire is the strongest aphrodisiac.”

China
Build tension with technology
Forget the three-day rule. In China, men follow up the day after a successful date—by e-mail. “Ttechnology plays a big role in relationships here,” says Yyoyoo Chow, sex editor of Men’s Health China. “Most couples meet over the Internet. So if a man doesn’t take the initiative soon, she’ll find someone else pretty quickly.”

How to do it : Send a short, suggestive note, says Chow. Something as simple as “Llast night... wow! When can I see you again?” will incite her interest. If she feels the same way, she’ll respond accordingly. Aas the sexual tension builds, resist the temptation to pour out your soul or create a list of your top 10 fantasies. At this early stage, short equals sexy—always. And remember: use of emoticons will ensure that you spend the night alone. 

Italy
Seduce her with food
It’s no secret that good food, wine and conversation lead to great sex. “Italian men flock to dinner parties to meet women,” says Adriana Amedei, sex editor at Men’s Health Italy. “There’s no crowd, no noise, it’s relaxed. All you have to do is share your opinions... at least to start.” The real mating game, says Amedei, begins at the table. Flirting overtly over a meal (or discreetly under the table) builds tension that will spill over later. “Food and sex are intimately connected, because they tap into the senses,” says Martha Hopkins, author of InterCourses: An Aphrodisiac Cookbook.

How to do it : “Listen, make eye contact and seek out a common interest,” says Hopkins. “Then, while eating, conjure up the same sounds that accompany sex: mmm, oooh, aahh.” You’re creating a mood and a fantasy. Be subtle. You don’t want the host to say, “Um, do you mind? We’re eating.”

India
Prolong your pleasure
Indian men have long known that the journey to an orgasm is almost always more interesting than the destination itself. “Sexual pleasure is linked to the gradual process of seduction, which includes courtship, touching and kissing,” says Sanjay Srivastava, PhD, author of Passionate Modernity. “Focussing on the finish misses the point.”

How to do it : Practise a technique called karezza, in which the man remains inside the woman for at least 10 minutes, moving only when necessary to maintain an erection. Penetrate her slowly and gently. Match your breathing and maintain eye contact with her to focus on your emotional connection, not just the physical act. “Conventional sex can be very limiting,” says Kenneth Rray Stubbs, PhD, author of The Essential Tantra. “This (karezza) results in an enhanced climax for both partners.”

Netherlands
Play with positions
Lovers in the Netherlands know what they want—and how to ask for it. Sixty-four per cent of Dutch men and women are confident about asserting their needs during sex, according to the Durex survey. “In bars, men are picked up as often as they approach women, and both are willing to experiment in bed,” says Achsa Vissel, a Dutch sex psychologist. Being frank with your compliments— and desires—will pave the way for pleasure.

How to do it : “Dutch men pay a lot of attention to places on her body that seem less erotic, like the inner arms, back and shoulders,” says Vissel. This shaking up of the routine leads to more sex: 63 per cent of the Dutch are satisfied with the amount of sex they’re having. When you and your partner are ready to move past the missionary position, try moves that let you stroke her clitoris during sex, like doggy-style or cowgirl.

Greece
Don’t be so uptight
Certain nationalities (Americans, for instance) are bombarded with sexual imagery all day, yet they are cagey about sex. Not so in Greece. “We talk about sex all the time—in the office, with our friends, with our partners,” says Nikki Hayia, sex editor of Men’s Health Greece. “A Greek man can talk dirty to his woman in front of 10 people, and it doesn’t bother him to kiss and touch her in public.” Simple public displays of affection can work for you: a study by the Berman Center in Chicago found that couples who kiss often in non-sexual situations are eight times more likely to be sexually satisfied.

How to do it : Hint at what’s to come, says Hayia: subtly stroke her thigh or lower back during dinner; run your fingers up her leg; steal a lingering kiss on her bare shoulder at a bar. “Relax, guys. Have sex like there’s no tomorrow,” says Hayia.

Perfect the 10-minute seduction

Many things run through a woman’s mind when you meet. Here’s how to go from “hello” to “oh my”.

Your approach 
Her brain quickly vets your height and facial symmetry the moment you meet. Now convince her of your character. Approach confidently; don’t pretend to bump into her. “Men tend to talk to each other at angles to avoid confrontation,” says Rutgers University anthropologist Helen Fisher, PhD, author of Why We Love. “But women face each other head-on and maintain eye contact.”

Your voice 
The most attractive women prefer deep-voiced men, according to a recent study by Scottish researchers. It suggests high testosterone levels, a sign of strength and reproductive prowess. Push out air with your diaphragm, not your throat. This lengthens the column of air moving past your vocal cords. “It’s like a built-in subwoofer,” says voice coach Joanne Joella.

Your icebreaker 
Say something that will draw out her details. “Your friends seem nice—how did you get to know them?” is a compliment and a window into her past. Forming a bond will release dopamine, a mood booster, in her brain. Show your interest with verbal nods of agreement, adds Alex Pentland, PhD, an MIT professor whose software assesses whether speed daters are feeling sparks.

Your body language 
Attraction causes couples to mirror each other’s body language. But don’t be overeager to connect. Stay relaxed and let her set the tone, says Lisa Clampett, founder of the Matchmaking Institute. Fidgeting conveys nervousness and triggers the release of stress chemicals in her brain. “Once she brushes your shoulder or thigh, reciprocate in a minute or two,” Fisher says. Or touch her inner forearm, a nerve-rich zone that will create sparks.

Your deal-closer 
If you’ve made the right sort of first impression, she might be wondering how you are in bed. “Consciously or not,” says Fisher, “she’s looking for signs that you’re patient and sensitive to the ways her body finds pleasure.” So talk her through the dessert options. Don’t handle the cutlery roughly. Call out the scent notes of a bottle of wine. Show refined tastes in these areas and she’ll suspect you have others worth exploring— back at her place.

Rev her engines

Women have their most sensual trigger zones. Drive her wild by touching her right where she wants.

1 Soothe her
"The foundation of her orgasm is relaxation," points out Men's Health columnist Pooja Bedi. Here's how to do the trick: cradle the back of her neck with one hand, placing your thumb on one side and your fingers on the other. Alternate rubbing five firm, slow circles on each side. "She'll relax and open up in no time," 
2 Trace a path
Lick her with long strokes from the inside of her knee to the top of her thigh, stopping just short of the hot zone. Then kiss her lightly up the same path. "The anticipation of having you move even higher is such a turn-on," says Patti Britton, PhD, author of The Art of Sex Coaching. "Telegraphing your move beforehand heightens anticipation."

3 Fan the fire
"Breathe on her clitoris in short, fast spurts," suggests Bedi. "It feels like an air vibrator."

4 Hit the right tune
"Cover your teeth with your lips and hum while you gently nibble her ear," ! "The vibrations intensify the sensation."

5 Double her pleasure
Kiss her collar bone, starting at her left shoulder and working your way in. Mimic the movement with your fingertips on her right shoulder. "The two sensations will heighten her arousal,"

Sex On the tip of your tongue

Oranges and figs be aphrodisiacs, but are certainly not the only fruits you can use to make a woman reach orgasm, fast and furiously. Getting a woman to orgasm using her clitoris is a simple task, because all it takes are a few basic tricks. Almost all men-even those who've passed with flying colours in ladies' toilet-conversations-feel a bit lost as soon as they face the lips down there. Learn the skills and you will become an extremely hot commodity. 

From beginner level to expert, there's something new to learn for everybody. So take out your black books, start taking notes and envisage the orgasmic returns you'll get on your invested time. Nothing is impossible, especially this. You can achieve it with these simple lessons. Pay attention. The class is now in progress.

1. The best way to get her to orgasm quickly is to slow down
As counter-intuitive as it sounds, spending time preparing your woman will definitely save you hours later. In fact, the time you take before going down on her is inversely proportional to the time you'll have to spend actually down there. She'll feel self-conscious if she's taking ages to come and will be inclined to fake it to save your ego. This also means you won't risk getting a locked jaw in the process. 

A good way to prepare her is to share a sexy shower or bath. This not only ensures you can enjoy eating her, it also takes her mind off work or other worries, and will ease her own concerns about whether she's clean enough to relax when you head downstairs. Once she's all hot and steamy, relax, start with some chit chat and then get on to business.

2. Coax her into purring mode
You need to tease her genitals, not commit an invasion. While you're kissing, press a thigh between her legs and grind in. Move it up and down between her legs. It's the washing-machine-on-spincycle principle-the overall vibration has a greater arousing effect than just using a finger or two. This type of indirect contact with her clitoris and vagina is a great way to get her warmed up. 

Then move down and nibble her through her skirt as a teasing prelude until she starts grinding on your face-she'll soon be in a hurry to strip to her knickers. Which is when you can try breathing and licking on her labia through her panties. This type of titillation ensures that when you finally do touch down on her clitoris, there's an explosive reaction

3. Read her lips to find your way to her clitoris
To get her to orgasm in the quickest time possible, you need to be able to locate her clitoris with ease. 

By far the easiest way to locate any woman's clitoris is to use her inner lips, or labia minora, as a guide. Follow them along from the bottom (closest to her behind) until they come together towards the top (belly button side). Just above that is a fleshy horizontal fold. That's the clitoral hood. Put a finger above that and gently pull up, towards her belly. This will expose a small feshy knob-that's her clitoris. 

These little epicenters of pleasure come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. Some clitorises hide, others jump out; some women have larger outer lips while others have none; and some women have hefty clitoral hoods that need to be pulled back to get to the love button. So there's simply no way you can know exactly where her clitoris is nor how to touch it until you've explored it thoroughly. 

Take a good look once you've found it. You'll see it doesn't look like a button the way a nipple does- it's the same colour as her inner lips which makes it a little tricky to see, but it does stand proud off the surrounding area when it's fully aroused and engorged with blood. All courtesy of you, of course!

4. Plums provide the right pressure test 
Once you've located her clitoris, use your thumb to gently stroke it. Her responses will let you know if you're doing well. If you're in doubt, ask her. But don't ask her "Does that feel good?" because it's vague. Ask her "Do you like it faster?" or "Do you want it harder?" That way, you'll get a more honest answer. 

Some girls have very sensitive pleasure knobs and they may not like direct touch immediately. If that's the case, try caressing from the outside of the hood. 

To get an idea of what kind of pressure to apply, use a ripe plum or peach. First, run your finger tips across the surface of the plum. If your fingernails or fingers are too rough or jagged, they'll tear the skin-that means they'd tear the skin of a woman too, so use a nail file and some moisturiser to smoothen them. Now, hold the plum with both hands, cupping it so that the fingertips of one hand touch the tips of the other. Slowly press in with the fingertips from your little finger to the index finger, as if you're massaging in a wave. If the plum splits open on the first go around, you're doing this too hard. 

When you're doing this on her, cup her whole vulva in your hands. Squeeze gently, and then begin the move. Avoid the urge to penetrate her. Warm her up from the outside first.

5. She may not know it, but what she'll really enjoy is a good shafting
Attached to a woman's clitoris is the clitoral shaft-manipulate it to give her the female equivalent of a hand-job. The clitoris you see is just the head of a nerve bundle that goes up into her body. You can find the shaft if you gently, but firmly, grasp around the upper labia, including the clitoris and clitoral hood, using your fingers. You'll feel something like a thin electrical cable-the clitoral shaft. Keeping the grip, slowly stroke that bundle. It's something most women never experience.

6. Learn the 'how tos' with Polo mints
This may sound a bit ridiculous, but it works. Take a Polo mint and pop it in your mouth, placing it between the front of your teeth and lips. The hole is her clitoris. Use your tongue tip to trace a circular pattern in one direction and then the other. Then poke the hole with your tongue. Sweep the hole from bottom to top and side to side, circle again and then poke. Repeat until the Polo breaks. You can practise this anywhere, at any time. Women orgasm through consistent rhythmical stimulation so once she's enjoying a particular move, don't change what you're doing.